Who Do We Cancel? Exploring The Allegations against Tory Lanez & Megan Thee Stallion

He Said/ She Said

Why do we pay so much attention to other people’s problems? I’ve learned that much of it is based on our own personal reflections of moments in our lives—other times its boredom. Megan Thee Stallion alleges that she had been shot by Tory Lanez Megan Thee Stallion Names Tory Lanez As The Person Who Shot Her Tory Lanez alleges that it didn’t happen the way Meg explained it. TI Reportedly Says He Had A Conversation With Tory Lanez About The Megan Thee Stallion Incident—“He Said It Didn’t Happen Like That” I’ve been wanting to give my opinion on the conflict from my personal experience as a man who has dealt with women making false allegations against him. 

For the record, I’m not saying Meg is making false allegations against Tory. I don’t have enough information to make a statement like that.   Prior to writing this article, I recorded two podcasts through zoom audio. The first podcast was after Meg Thee Stallion shared her side of what happened the night of her arrest. The other was after Tory Lanez dropped his album. I had babies crying in the background and didn’t feel the sound quality was good enough to publish in case you were wondering why I didn’t post it.

Kehlani Speculation

I also thought that the moment had passed to talk about the subject, but then there was yet another viral social media post most recently with allegations that Kehlani had unfollowed Meg Thee Stallion. The speculation was that Kehlani had a change of heart in her support for Meg. These allegations sparked a conversation with one of my oldest friends about the lack of support and protection Black women have. We explored the topic of police brutality, and after moments of getting into each other’s feelings, we agreed that the only way Black men can protect Black women is by respecting them and defending them. When Black men become another thing that hurts Black women, they feel as alone as Black men do in society.  

My friend asked me, my thoughts on the allegation. After monitoring the story for the last few months my thoughts were Kehlani prejudged the allegations held against Tory. I felt she decided to take herself out of the drama by unfollowing Meg. 

Kehlani’s response to the allegations was that she was just doing some fall social media cleaning, but I wasn’t convinced by her statement. Kehlani Responds After Fans Point Out That She Unfollowed Megan Thee Stallion On Instagram The more that was being revealed, the more suspect Meg looked. I believe other people share my views and that was the reason the story went viral.

My friend felt that Tory was guilty and that Kehlani should continue to support Meg, based on Black women not being supported in domestic cases.  My argument was when Meg first went ahead and told her side of the story, there were holes in her story. She explained why she didn’t report Tory right away but then she made allegations that didn’t make sense.

Who Gets Cancelled?

From the outside looking in, there just didn’t seem to be enough information to make a judgement on who was being cancelled. I just wanted to wait for the trial. I figured most of the information would come out then. Whatever the evidence didn’t tell us, the witness testimonies would fill in the gaps. Then Tory Lanez dropped his album. On the album, he says that he didn’t shoot her. 

Tory brought up most of the same concerns I had. Tory Lanez Went Live On Instagram To Pick Apart Megan Thee Stallion’s Side Of Her Shooting On the album he reminds us that Meg said she had left the vehicle from an argument. She later heard shots and then there was blood running down her leg. Then she went on to talk about the police being there, being scared and not wanting to die. She was also afraid of Tory’s life which is why she didn’t say anything at the time. But she went back in the car with Tory and then sought out medical treatment. 

I couldn’t understand how she was able to ID Tory as the shooter when her back was facing the shooter, since she was walking away. It was reported that there were traces of the bullet shell casing in the wound. People are saying that the investigation believes it could have been a ricochet. That doesn’t mean that the shooter wasn’t trying to kill her. It just means the bullet case bounced off something and traces of it came into contact with her wound. When I saw the photos of the injuries, there were no intro and exit wounds from the bullet just cuts.

It just didn’t seem to add up. When a bullet pierces through your skin it usually damages your tendons or bones. Meg’s injuries were minor and her recovery was short.  When she made her testimony on Instagram live it sounded like Tory had the full intent to harm her with the weapon. I just didn’t see Tory Lanez as being capable of attempted murder, especially to a woman. His songs on the radio were either love songs or club anthems. Tory Lanez Says There Is A False Narrative That He Doesn’t Support Black Women—And States That He Has No History Of Violence Against Women 

They say ask and you shall receive.  A number of my friends had sent me some freestyles where Tory had threatening lyrics towards women. Compared to some of the music Eminem has made about his ex-wife or his mother they didn’t seem much different. Eminem’s song Kim is about him catching his wife cheating, confronting her and then murdering her. This comparison allowed me to question if all musicians with abusive lyrics towards women should be cancelled.  

Should We Cancel Hip Hop or Just Those Artists?

Most Hip Hops musicians have been violent, or disrespectful towards women through their lyrics or through their music videos. They are normally going through something, high, or drunk. Listen to any of Futures albums for a reference. I just hear broken-hearted men not being able to respectfully express themselves because they are still upset over whatever they are upset about.

Then I thought, can we separate the artist from the music? There are a number of recording artists that have had assault allegations. Trey Songz was most recently hit with an assault charge this year and there have been years where he was served with multiple. Trey Songz Appears Unbothered As He Enjoys A Pedicure Following Recent Sexual Assault Allegations

Trey Songz’ Alleged Assault Victim Drops The Lawsuit Against Him Chris Brown spent time in jail and lost many endorsements. I felt like the man in the mirror performance he did at the BET awards was his redemption performance. I felt when they say Chris broke down on stage. Empathy allowed Chris not to be cancelled.  

When Chris dropped his documentary, I found that it was quite interesting how abusive Rihanna was towards him. I can’t remember Rihanna ever being cancelled. I didn’t see any accountability from the media. Despite the fact that she hasn’t put out an album in a number of years she’s remained relevant with her Fendi lingerie line and other business ventures. 

My social feed had me thinking that everyone was taking the Meg and Tory situation personally. There seems to be a split between my peers. I knew both men and women for and against Meg/Tory but they were all looking at it from the lens of what if it were them. It’s hard to have compassion for others when you can’t see yourself in the other person’s shoes. So I decided to look at it differently. I decided to look at Meg and Tory as if they were my own children in a dispute. 

The Father Perspective

I started thinking what if it was CJ in Tory’s shoes. How would I handle it if I was on the jury? I know that would be a conflict of interest. In the Bible,  Moses’ brother Aaron was made the high priest for the Israelites. Despite him worshipping other idols and false Gods while he awaited his brother’s return of the commandments and decrees; God still chose Aaron because he knew he would have to judge others with the same shame he bares from his own sins humbling him.  

There was a fight between my son and my daughter. I wanted to think of a way to find compassion and decided to look at it from a different lens. What if Meg thee stallion was like my second daughter Eva? And what if Tori Lanez was like CJ. In the event that it was one of them in this situation, how would I react? And how would I want either of them to remain accountable for their actions? And this is where it gets tricky because now you’re not looking at two people that are complete strangers. Now you’re looking at them as two people that you care about. You’re looking at them as human beings so there’s a lot of empathy.

If my son had indeed attempted to murder another woman, let’s say his sister was Meg Thee Stallion. Then I would want him to receive the necessary punishment to the full extent of the law, and I would weep and I would grieve. But, in the event that he was innocent that he didn’t attempt to murder her point-blank.?? This sentence feels unfinished

It smells like a setup. I believe there’s more to the story where someone else is involved, maybe they shot at Tory, or maybe there was the ricochet from Tory’s bullet that hit a street light and that’s what cut Meg. Then I just want it to be looked at differently because right now, it just kind of looks like Tori tried to kill Meg over love or an argument.

My children hide things when they tell a story because they are looking for key parts to make them look better than their opposers. I’ve learned that in every problem there is wrong on both sides.

I’m not saying that I’m team anybody, but I am saying that for anybody that’s looking at the situation between Meg, and Tory,  I think that they should look at it from the perspective as if these were two people that you loved and knew, like your mom and your dad, or your brother and, your sister or your son and your daughter. And think about the consequences because Tory is looking at 23 years. 23 years of his life is a long time, especially as he’s also a father.

 I’ve been talking to a lot of my female friends, and I’ve been getting a number of different perspectives. I have friends that have been in psychologically, physically, emotionally, and verbally abusive relationships with men and their perspective are let’s crucify Tory. 

And then I have other female friends that I don’t think they have had a physically abusive relationship or maybe they have but they haven’t shared it with me, but they seem to be a little bit more content and ask well what did Meg do? Rihanna looked innocent in the assault case with Chris Brown, but when I watched the documentary I saw Rihanna in a different light and although I saw her in that light no one else seemed to care. No one seemed to care how much Chris had lost.  What are men supposed to do when we are assaulted and how do we defend ourselves? 

Even The Innocent Aren’t Always Innocent

The Chris Brown documentary taught me that women who assault men won’t be held accountable. And then there are other women who I can tell that they’ve been hurt and they’re just ready to crucify him despite the holes in the story. And in the event that Tory is found innocent,  I don’t feel that there’s going to be any sort of empathy or apology for Tory. If he’s found guilty,  Tory will be forced to pick up the pieces himself. 

I feel like this is probably going to be very damaging for him and I don’t think he’s going to be able to move on from this and be as successful as he once was. Chris Brown is still thriving but I feel Chris would have been more successful if he didn’t have the Rihanna scandal. 

My mother warned me that there are people in the world with bad intentions that come in the form of our vices. Both Tory and Meg seem to be very hurt souls who haven’t been able to grieve in a fast-paced environment. I think personal feelings and experiences have to be put aside when considering which side we’re going to side with and waiting to hear the full story before judging should be considered. Are we informing ourselves from both sides, or just choosing a side that we feel is the most legitimate based on our personal issues?

Leave a comment and let me know whether you agree with my views or not. 

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